1-29 The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Its been a week of ups and downs. A lot more downs than ups, but I'm thinking that will change starting today. No matter what life throws at me, I'm trying hard to keep a positive outlook. Negativity breeds negativity and I want to be positive!

My cat is recovering nicely after his brush with death the other day. It appears that only his tail was run over by the car. Its still missing a lot of fur, but the exposed skin is healing purrfectly! He's still not running around as much as he use to, but I would imagine that he is sore. Within a week or so, he should be good as new.

After my daughter told me she needed a graphing calculator for school, I freaked out a bit. I don't understand how a school can require you to buy a calculator that cost $100. I began hitting up my friends and coworkers to see if they had one or, in some cases, their child who is now out of college has one. My efforts paid off because a coworker found one at his house and he is going to give it to me for free.

The girl that was working with me is being moved to another department and they are not replacing her. I will have to pick up most of her workload. She honestly didn't do much, but it will add 6-8 hours a week onto what I already have. I was extremely frustrated by this at first but after throwing my little tantrum, I decided to make the most of it. I went to one boss and asked if she could have someone else do a few minor tasks that I perform. She agreed that it was a good idea. I went to another boss and asked him to take on a few spreadsheets I'm required to do. He agreed to do those. I went to a third boss (I have 4 bosses that I report to. Kind of feels like Office Space) and asked him to follow up on some issues -m having with another department so that I can streamline my work. He thought it was a great idea. All in all I managed to cut my load down by about 3 hours a week. Hopefully I can squeeze in the rest by working harder. If not, I will have to work some overtime but they will pay me for it. I am a pretty good negotiator!

I was supposed to go to Atlanta this weekend to meet up with a friend and his wife for his birthday. Friday, at the end of his shift, my friend was fired. I was upset to hear that but somewhat relieved when he said that he wouldn't be able to afford to go to Atlanta. When I received a picture message an hour later of him getting a pedicure saying "screw it. Its my birthday and I'm going to have fun" I was not only down hearted, but also disappointed in his behavior. If you're broke, then how can you afford a trip that will set you back at least $150??? My best friend told me that it was none of my business. My thoughts: if my friend were an alcoholic and I was going to a bar with him, I would be encouraging and enabling his behavior. Why is this any different? I personally don't think a good friend would keep their mouth shut and so.... I won't.

The best news of all, I finally weighed myself for the first time since December 28th. I have dropped 8.4 pounds. My daughter has dropped 6.2. Our work has begun paying off! Now just 61.6 more to go! I think I will kick that off by walking. 5K this morning. Hopefully, my daughter will come with me.

1-26

Today has been a frustrating day. I felt great when I left the house this morning, but not 5 minutes down the road, my daughter had me aggravated talking about her school. Email was out all morning at work. I called the IRS about some money I owe them and they weren't exactly willing to work with me. They aren't the only one who is broke! At lunch I was informed that I am losing my helper and my work load is going way up. Great. The whole reason they gave me someone to help is because I was overwhelmed. Then, my daughter calls to tell me about her first day in her new classes for the semester. She needs about $150 worth of supplies and the internet. I cut the internet off because I couldn't afford it. I use my phone but I realize that it would be hard to do research on a blackberry. After work, I went to the pharmacy to pick up the medicine I take to keep my stomach from hurting all the time. Only insurance no longer covers my meds and I have to go back to my doctor. I went home, ate dinner, and decided that I deserve a hot fudge sundae after the day I had. Pulling out of the driveway, my daughter hits my cat. Poor little guy is laying in bed with me hurt. Thank God he's alive and not seriously injured! Just bruised up a bit. I'm going to bed early tonight because I want this day to end as quickly as possible. Tomorrow is a new day and a new beginning.

Ok, I'm done with my pity party for now.

January 23rd

This was the third week of me trying to become healthier and by far the hardest yet. Part of it was my daughter not wanting to continue participating, part was my coworkers constantly eating fried foods around me, and part of it was my own willpower. They say it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. I'm hoping that now that I've finished week three, I can call this healthier eating and workout habit and not a fad.

This week not only tested me, but my daughter as well. She had fallen off the wagon while spending the weekend at her father's house and basically refused to work out with me all week. I was having trouble motivating myself and now I had to find the strength to motivate her as well. By the weekend however, she was back on board with the eating, even coming up with her own ideas of things to cook, and she was back to working out with me. We went today and walked the same route as the 5K I had done a few months back. She stopped just after the 2 mile mark but I consider it progress for her. I finished the track in a minute and a half less than I did 3 months earlier. My goal is to go from the 51:09 5K I did today to a 40:00 by the end of the year.

I work in a department that consist of 8 people including myself. One of the men goes out every day to get lunch for himself and another girl to bring back to the office and eat at their desks. I have no way of avoiding it when they are in such close proximity to my desk. Considering they both need to lose weight themselves, I wish they'd cut that out.

I fought myself daily to workout. I didn't do it as much as I should have, but at least I can say I did it. The fact that I am extremely sore right now makes me feel good about my progress.

Week four begins tomorrow. I hope I can keep up the good spirit and find the drive needed to be successful at this endeavor!

First Blog Ever January 15th 2011

Last year I made my first New Year's resolution and I actually stuck to it. It was a simple one: getting to know my family better. This year I decided to have two resolutions, one simple and one not. The first one is to spend time with my daughter by getting out and doing things. The second and much more difficult one is to loose seventy pounds.

I had been watching the show Sarah Palin's Alaska and she inspired me. She was spending the summer with her family doing lots of fun things in her home state of Alaska. That is when I decided to get out with my daughter and do fun things here in our home state of North Carolina. Granted I don't have Mrs. Palin's funds or connections, but there are many things we can do without breaking the bank. I have my daughter typically during the week and every other weekend. My goal is to do 26 activities with her. We did our first activity last weekend by going to the Mint Museum in Charlotte. I never realized how much my daughter loves art. Not only did I learn about the art, learn some history, but I also learned about my daughter as well. All in all, it was a very successful trip!

Since I moved out of my mother's house 14 years ago, I have managed to put on 75 pounds. I weigh more now than I did when I was 9 months pregnant! I have wanted to loose weight for years but all too quickly my motivation disappears and I am right back where I started. I am hoping this year is different because I have a support system in place now. My daughter, 17, also wants to loose weight so we are working out together and trying to watch what we eat. Its much easier to do when we are both on board. Also, my best friend Anthony is also trying to loose weight. He use to weigh 500 pounds and has managed to loose 200 of that by hard work and dedication. He has taught me that turkey bacon taste good and that you can still eat things you love as long as its in moderation. The show I Use To Be Fat has also encouraged me and my daughter to get up and move. Just like what my friend Ant has said, they tell you that you don't have to change what you're eating 100% but that you can change some of the ingredients to take your dish from fattening to healthy.

My daughter is at her father's house for the weekend so I have to find my own motivation to get up and move. I have been tossing ideas around in my head as to what I want to do and I have settled on taking my dog Peyton to the park for a brisk walk. The high today is in the low 40s but the sun is out and I don't want to start off the year making excuses. So, I am off!